I’ve been asked numerous times why my marriage is successful and how I manage to navigate the inevitable pitfalls. People often think it’s all about communication, which is important, but there’s another big piece of the puzzle: the people around you, or as I like to call them, your stakeholders. These are the folks who influence your marriage, offering their viewpoints and support.
In my book, I talk about how crucial it is to have what I call a “board” for your relationship. This means having a group of people, like a board of directors at a company, who help you steer your relationship. Let’s break down the three kinds of boards you should have: the Board of Advisors, the Board of Directors, and the Board of Trustees.
Board of Advisors
This is your broadest group. It could be anyone whose opinions and knowledge you value, even if you don’t know them personally. This might include authors, podcasters, or pastors—anyone whose insights you use to guide your decisions in your marriage.
Board of Directors
These are the people you know personally who help you apply what you’ve learned from your Board of Advisors to your specific situation. They offer targeted advice and help you navigate the unique aspects of your relationship. Think of them as close friends or mentors who know the ins and outs of your life.
Board of Trustees
This is the most intimate group, usually just one or two people who you can share anything with. This might be a counselor or a lifelong friend. They’re the ones you can get really deep with, discussing the nitty-gritty of your problems and finding long-term solutions.
Why You Need All Three
Your marriage benefits from each board in different ways. Your Advisors help you gather useful ideas and information, your Directors help you put those ideas into practice, and your Trustees help you deal with deep personal issues in a safe and supportive way.
Building a strong support system with these three boards can make a huge difference, whether you’re facing tough times or just want to make a good marriage even better. I’d love to hear if you’ve tried this approach. Watch the video and let me know what you think. Then, drop a comment below to share your experience or ask questions. And don’t forget to like and subscribe for more tips from our community.
Until next time,
Bonika W.